Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Let's see what happens

Sunday night about 10:30 Allie-14 had a complete meltdown. "We have a great life here, a great house. I finally have lots of good friends. Why are you making us move?"

There was no rationalizing with her. She's right. We have a great life here. We are not running from anything terrible. How could I explain to a fourteen-year-old who has only known suburbia that there might be a different life out there? I just listened and patted her arm and said, "Uh-huh," and offered her Kleenex.

This part of parenting is so hard. I just have to keep reminding myself that it's kinda like when we make them eat vegetables: we have to do things that we feel will ultimately benefit the whole family, even when it's painful now (Hey, bud, and if you don't eat it for dinner, guess what you will get for breakfast?).

Today we making are an offer on the fixer-upper in the country. We are fully aware that we are probably crazy to buy this house. It's not a very pretty house (as Dennis would say, "It's butt-ugly."). It's going to need a lot of work to chase the ugly out of it.

But it's on 12 beautiful acres not far from town, and I love the views from every single window. I'm trying not to hope, as we made an offer that reflects the amount of money we will need to put into it. Here's the driveway.

So we shall see...

Oh, and by the way, Allie was much better in the morning (isn't that how it always is?). I can't blame her for not wanting to leave her friends (I can't let myself think about my friends I'm leaving behind, either!). I think she's realizing that, no matter what, we are going to go through this together, and I hope some day she looks back on this as one of the best things we ever did as a family. I hope I do, too.

12 comments:

Deidre said...

12 acres? 12 acres? Oh my word, how wonderful! To live on 12 acres would be a dream come true.

I pray all of your children (and you) adjust well. Hey, if you don't - you have 12 ACRES to spread out - ha ha :)

fullheartandhands mama said...

We moved across the country when I had two weeks left of my freshman year of high school. It was one of the best things that could have happened to me.

Raquel said...

we are in the process of looking for a new home and one that needs lots of work is too on the top of our list. I cant wait to see where God takes you, and us =)

Jen said...

I'm excited for you and hope you show us pictures soon...good luck. Big step gal.

Susanne said...

Change is always hard at first. No matter how old you are. Looks like an absolutely beautiful area and I'm sure she'll love all the space when she has her friends over.

Lori - Queen of Dirty Laundry said...

Oh, bless her heart. We moved to the next town when I was a sophomore in HS. It was hard but I have nary a scratch or issue to show for it.

Plenty of other issues, but not about moving when I was 15. :>)

I'm so excited to hear what happens next! You're livin' my dream right now, girl.

Marian said...

Congratulations on selling your house!
Oh, how I yearn for some open space. Just the picture of your driveway, makes my heart ache. It looks lovely.

I'd moved 7 times by the time I was 17 and went off to college (20 hours away, of course, during which-- you guessed it--my parents moved again, from WI to PA.) Very generally speaking, I think what makes the difference between it being a good thing and a potentially bad thing is the parents- if they are sensitive and offer good emotional support and guidance, and if they make family identity a priority, moving only makes kids stronger and better-rounded people. Sure seems like you're that kind of parent!
God has good purposes for where leads!

She's So There.... said...

What a beautiful drive...and having just moved back to Suburbia in December with a freshman and senior...how hard. I am glad for our former rural days with our children, where they learned that life did not always revolve around what to do and where to go...but to learn to enjoy being. And just think...when you move out of suburbia you'll be two years ahead of every thing fashion, design and all that, so what you have will be "new" there! :)
hugs
Shan

Becca said...

What a fantastic driveway! I would move to the country in a heartbeat if it were possible-and someday it might be.
Hang in there with your daughter. Change was incredibly difficult for me at her age. Letting her talk her feelings out like you did is the best thing!

K in the Mirror said...

We moved from New Jersey to Dallas halfway through my freshman year. I know exactly how Allie feels. It was so hard. And honestly it took a couple years before I felt really settled here. But now I can see it was the best thing we ever did.

And you're not moving so far that she won't be able to see her friends, so that's good too.

12 acres!! how fabulous!!

julie said...

My heart is going pitter patter. I would love to have 12 acres.

so, were you afraid to show us the actual house because we might talk you out of it????? lol.

The driveway is lovely.

Julie

Mercy, Matzoh, Mac&Cheese said...

When I was 14 my family moved from Massachusetts to Iowa! Why, you ask? Because my parents were convinced that there was a better life out there for us and God was leading them here. It was hard to leave my friends, but our family drew close together through that and you know what, all three of us (my sisters and I) found our husbands here in Iowa...God is good. He will bless you for taking a stand and doing what you believe is right. Please let that encourage your daughter.