Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The know-it-all

Do you have a child that is a know-it-all?

I have one. Actually, I have several, but fortunately they take turns between being THE most annoying know-it-all, and being the one who has to have the last word. In which case you don't really have to know it all, you just have to be the loudest.

Here's the scene, twelve cars deep in carpool, people behind us, running late.

Child 1: I can't get the door open!
K-I-A: Unlock it!
Child 1: It's unlocked already!
[Sound of screeching plastic while handle is pulled five hundred times. Meanwhile, more cars piling up behind.]
K-I-A: [Reaching OVER Child 1 to make sure the door really IS unlocked, because one can never be too sure of another's ability to unlock a car door.] There must be something wrong with the door!
Mom: Child 1, please don't break the door handle. K-I-A, would you please go out and open the door from the outside for Child 1?
K-I-A: No, that won't work. There's something wrong with the door!
Child 2: I bet it's the child safety lock.
Mom: Yeah, I bet it IS the child safety lock.
K-I-A: [Scoffingly] We don't have child safety locks! There's something wrong with the door! Hurry! There are people behind us!
Mom: Here. I can pull up and a teacher will open the door.
[Teacher opens door easily from the outside. Child 1 gets out. Mom pulls away from curb.]
K-I-A: Man, I wonder what was wrong with the door?

I give up.


Beck said...

How did THe Girl get all the way down to your house?

Susanne said...

LOL. Oh yes, I have a know it all and the last worder, too. I don't know which annoys me more. Probably when one child combines the two. Oi!

amyanne said...

That is so funny. I love you.

I don't know why that story reminds me of myself...unfortunately not the mom, but the KIA.

LOVE this!

Cassandra said...

They only thing that makes this conversation better is when the KIA has, what my girls call "the preppy tone" going with it....which mine do :)

Lori said...

Oh No! You can't give up! There's hope - there's always hope! Right?!? Tell me there is....please? LOL!!!

Christy. said...

I have a KIA at my house. She is 7 1/2 years old and goes by the name of Avery! :0)

Mothership said...

I just discovered your blog and sat for way too long reading it. You are an inspiring mama.

Excuse me while I go have a quite few minutes with the one still awake.

And thank you.

Sherri@NoiseOverload said...

LOL. Very good. I feel like we have even more in common now. I have two KIA (so far). The other two just aren't old enough to act that way yet!

Grace, grace - we need grace!

Lori - Queen of Dirty Laundry said...

I've got a couple of those around here - one is 8 and one is 37.


Les & Sweetie Berry said...

I so enjoy your posts....our KIA is now 15 and we have allowed him to live some of his KIA answers...."I know I know Mom...I've got it handled" and somewhat had to smile as 23 seconds down the road he calls on his cell phone and says "I so forgot my khakis for game day requirements...could you bring them to me" it was all I could do not to say "You had it handled" but he and I both knew grace was what was needed....and this time I managed to remember how often I need it to and delivered it without fussing...KIA..how often must God have to wait on me to realize IKN(I know nothing)
and that He truly does!
Have a blessed weekend and thanks for sharing this life with us!

Michelle @ Sew-Krafty said...

I wish I was as smart as you to give up. I get all bulldog, and MAKE them admit they were WRONG. I'd love to say it's all in the spirit of character training, but truly it's so I can smile smugly and shout "I TOLD YOU SO!"...on the inside, of course ;)