Comments on Raising Five: Ask for help

I feel stupid asking for help because I "only" hav...

2008-08-07T17:09:00.000-05:00

I feel stupid asking for help because I "only" have two kids. SURELY I should be able to handle more kids, right? And I feel like I can't say "it's so hard" b/c then I'll never talk my husband into having more. Silly me...it can be hard, even with only one, and the Lord can change my husband's mind if He so chooses.

Thanks for this encouragement!

That's totally my problem - not asking. Too much p...

2008-08-01T07:42:00.000-05:00

That's totally my problem - not asking. Too much pride sometimes!

But my hubby does let me hire a housecleaner and that is a HUGE help, but we just moved and haven't found one at the new (bigger!) place yet.

I was hoping that now that our fourth is 1 year old that I would have time for cleaning, but, goodness, does she just make the biggest messes everywhere she goes. What a cute little stinker!

Our two oldest are beginning to be more helpful, but still, it's just a lot to do. And our third one is trying to potty train so that's even more to do.

So, yes, I need to work on asking for more help. That's very hard for me!

Asking for help is something we've learned to do t...

2008-07-26T22:57:00.000-05:00

Asking for help is something we've learned to do the hard way! We lost a baby at 12 days old. You can't survive that without help from family and friends. When a person is in crisis the best thing is to ask for specific help! Whether that "crisis" is good or bad - having a new baby or losing one.

I'm pregnant with our 6th baby. I can't do it all! I have a wonderful dh who helps out when he can and I have a wonderful church family full of teens who love my children almost as much as I do and are willing to help without pay if need be!

Having a plan is half the battle, though. At least that's what I've found. If I know what I want, no matter how weird or hormonal it may be, it is easier for people to help. Some people are not as intuitive as our mothers can be.

Good thoughts. With little ones around, it really...

2008-07-25T14:06:00.000-05:00

Good thoughts. With little ones around, it really does take most of our time and energy to just do the essentials for daily living! I'm there! Thankfully I have a cleaning service coming next week (thanks to a gift cert.) just for one time, to get us back to a "clean" slate before school. Halelujah!

Good point about asking your husband to help. Som...

2008-07-24T21:57:00.000-05:00

Good point about asking your husband to help. Sometimes it's the obvious things that I miss! It's definitely hard for me to ask for help, even from him...because I want to be able to do it all by myself, but I just can't. And I only have 1 kid!

Kathleen,
I just wanted to let you know that I ...

2008-07-24T15:14:00.000-05:00

Kathleen,
I just wanted to let you know that I have been reading your past posts on your public school decision. I could have written that post! I have 5 children ages 13, 12, 9, 4 and almost 2(will be 2 in oct.).

I am tired, cranky, depressed, and just feel like I cannot spin those plates anymore.

However, I feel like I am would be just handing my kids over to Satan if I put them in Public School!! Well, at least that is what most of the homeschoolers think around here. SIGH.. I don't even fit in with them! We are conservative Christians, BUT we don't "hide them in a closet"... I KNOW you know what I mean.

So here I am, my chest feels like a ton of bricks are on me, trying to make the best decision. I dream about the break from planning and carrying the homeschooling out... and just letting them go to school. I also feel like I have short changed my 4 and almost 2yo! My 4yo is whiny and is constantly hanging on me. I just realized it was because I push her away too much because I am tooooooooooooo busy trying to either educate my older children, plan their education, or getting caught up with housework! She needs me so bad.

AAARRRGGG!!! I just don't know what to do. I fear that everyone will think I have backslidden and will never talk to me again. CRY!!

Back to dream land.... I would drop the older ones off at school, go workout at the gym (my passion, which has not happened lately... so I now have 30 pounds of excess baggage!!) ha ha... Then, run any errands that need to be ran. Come home and PLAY and READ and SNUGGLE and PAY ATTENTION to my littles. Is that sooo bad??

Ok.. Sorry, I just feel like I have no one to "talk" to about this, so you are stuck listening. LOL!!
Thanks,
Jennifer

You have no idea how good that feels to hear someo...

2008-07-23T23:00:00.000-05:00

You have no idea how good that feels to hear someone else say that having many little ones is hard! I have only 3, but it is tough work keeping up on everything.

I have a hard time asking for help. My husband is good at sensing when I need it. He helps out sooooo much and when he can't, he makes sure that I try to get someone to come in.

I know when I had number 4 and 5 my Mom came to he...

2008-07-23T19:46:00.000-05:00

I know when I had number 4 and 5 my Mom came to help, and the first things that she did were to tackle the laundry!!! I guess Mom's just know the right things to do--even when their babies are moms too!!

Theresa

Asking for help is a big problem for me. I am one ...

2008-07-23T17:16:00.000-05:00

Asking for help is a big problem for me. I am one of those "super moms" and admitting I'm anything less is really hard for me. But now that I have 3 kids, I HAVE to. I've been getting better at assigning jobs to my husband and the kids do help out a lot. Still asking is pretty hard.

NOt really on topic with the cleaning, but Gary Ch...

2008-07-23T15:34:00.000-05:00

NOt really on topic with the cleaning, but Gary Chapman has a new book out that extends his Love Languages books into making love a way of life. And helping others and ASKING for help are included in those ways of loving others.